Christine Bee
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Romantic train rides

6/26/2002

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The probably most romantic movies of all times for me is 'Before Sunrise'. Two young people, one American, one French, meet on a train and agree to spent 20 hours together in Vienna. This story isn't too unrealistic if you think two people meet and both are spontaneous enough to get off the train.

If I ride the train I am usually so consumed thinking what the trip will bring that I don't think this would happen to me, even if I would get off in any case, especially if someone like Ethan Hawke would ask me.

Today I am occupied with life and sorting all my thoughts, eliminating old problems and sorting out stuff, what I want on my travel in the future and what has to go.

Talking 'relationships' I tend to steer away from wanting one. It's complicated. I wish for the familiarity that a new person won't be able to give me for quite some while and also like to feel intellectually attracted to this person. All men I know would result in 3 to 4 potential mates, but thinking rational, I won't want settle for.

The expectations toward a new relationship should grow over time. If the new relationship isn't any better as the one before, I would have to admit to myself I did not learn anything. Or that with advanced age the selection lacks quality and the choices are in fact way more limited.

My inner voice tells me to be satisfied with being Single for life and this might be the only way to have enough energy and mental capacity to be creative. Down with all the boring twosomes, down with being grouchy over stubble in the sink, and someone sitting on the toilet forever. Down with the frustration the other person isn't really that interested or a new person will fit so much better to that partner once you split up. Redundant. 

My theory is, there isn't real friendship between potential sexual partners. It isn't disproved yet and I wonder if it is a better strategy to just go for a quiet and secret 'friends with benefits' thing instead of hoping for the perfect match. If you are single and haven't thought about this as a viable option, you are lying.

It takes a lot of courage to open up to a good friend and admit the wish to have more. If the wish gets rejected you not only lose the friendship, but usually run in more complications. And if it is a really good friend, it's even harder to gamble with that. It's probably more common friends not admitting having more feelings for one another then happy couples admitting to cheating. Happy relationships usually don't last for longer than 2 years anyway for people with average education and social environment. 

This theory will destroy many manly illusions your female friends really enjoy boring get togethers over coffee and cake and chatting about the views of the other gender.
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